Fairy whisper!

Since turning 40 and having a baby, the combination has left me feeling like my MOT has run out, but not to feel defeated by nature I have enrolled myself into a Pilates class. You know, the one for core stability, alignment, muscle tone etc. The only class that fits in with nursery care is for the next step up from beginners and you need to have at least one year’s experience. Not having done Pilates before but knowing I will cope, I went to my local library and took out a book on the subject to bring me up to speed with any technicalities that I would possibly need.

The first and most important exercise is:
Centering – Creating a ‘Girdle of Strength’

Breathe in wide and full into your back and sides and lengthen up through the spine. As you breath out, contract and draw up the muscles of your pelvic floor as if you were to take the pelvic lift up to the first floor, then second floor, then third floor.
And I quote from the book “We know it sounds daft, but one way to help locate these muscles, (urethra in men and vagina in women), is to suck your thumb as you draw them up inside. Crazy, but effective!”

Ooh! Mmhh! I am probably doing it wrong. So I read the instructions again, put the book down and get into correct position, relax, breath in, breath out, suck thumb. Lift going up to the 1st floor, 2nd floor but before I get to the 3rd floor, there it is again – this fairy whisper tingling on my clitoris. I have no idea what it would do for men, but I thought, you crafty little buggers, all these children (and some adults too) sucking their thumbs – for comfort so they say, meantime there they are walking around with an ever so innocent fairy type vibrator.

Remember the time before the internet – when you would get this circular of a joke or mischief picture? It was a photocopy of a photocopy of another photocopy and it would do the rounds. Well many a photocopy passed my way, but there has always been this particular one that has remained in my memory. It is of these two lovely chubby naked babies. The baby boy sitting happy as ever with a dummy in his mouth; the baby girl happier with a dummy in her vagina; and the caption beneath: Girls have more fun!

«««Don’t you just love being a woman»»»

Watch this space for my Fairy Goddess Workshop.
First lesson: suck your thumb!

of life ...

Not my own this time, but some useful insights on my latest book read!!!

The Seven Spiritual Laws of Life – Deepak Chopra

1. The Law of Pure Potentiality

i. I will take time each day to be silent – to just Be
I will sit alone in silent meditation – twice a day (approx 30 minutes each morning & night)
ii. I will take time each day to commune with nature – the field of pure potentiality and unbounded creativity – and to silently witness the intelligence within every living thing
iii. I will practice non-judgement

2. The Law of Giving

i. Wherever I go and whomever I encounter, I will bring them a gift: compliment, flower, or a prayer etc.
ii. I will gratefully receive all the gifts that life has to offer me: nature, sunlight, sound of birds singing etc.
I will also be open to receiving from others: material gifts, money, compliment or a prayer etc.
iii. I will make a commitment to keep wealth circulating in my life by giving and receiving life’s most precious gifts of caring, affection, appreciation and love.
I will silently wish everyone I meet: happiness, joy and laughter.

3. The Law of “Karma” or Cause and Effect

i. I will witness the choices I make in each moment – to be fully conscious in the present
ii. Whenever I make a choice, I will ask myself two questions:
“What are the consequences of this choice that I am making?”
“Will this choice bring fulfillment and happiness to me and to those who are affected by this choice?”
iii. I will then ask my heart for guidance and be guided by its message of comfort or discomfort.

4. The Law of Least Effort – “do less and accomplish more”

i. I will practice Acceptance: people, situations, circumstances and events as they occur - this moment is as it should be
ii. Having accepted things as they are, I will take Responsibility for my situation and for all those events I see as problems – by not blaming anyone or anything for my situation (including myself)
iii. My awareness will remain established in Defenselessness – I will relinquish the need to defend my point of view and not be attached to any one of them
I will feel no need to convince or persuade others to accept my point of view

5. The Law of Intention and Desire

i. I will make a list of all my desires. I will look at this list before I go into my silence and meditation
ii. I will release this list of my desires and surrender it to the womb of creation, trusting that when things
don’t seem to my way, there is a reason, and that the cosmic plan has designs for me much grander that even those that I have conceived
iii. I will remind myself to practice present-moment awareness in all my actions.
I will refuse to allow obstacles to consume and dissipate the quality of my attention in the present moment.
I will accept the present as it is, and manifest the future through my deepest, most cherished intentions and desires

6. The Law of Detachment

i. I will commit myself to detachment – to participate in everything with detached involvement
I will allow myself and those around me the freedom to be as they are
I will not rigidly impose my idea of how thins should be
I will not force solutions on problems, thereby creating new problems
ii. In my willingness to accept uncertainty, solutions will spontaneously emerge out of the problem,
out of the confusion, disorder, and chaos
iii. I will step into the field of all possibilities and anticipate the excitement that can occur when I remain open to an infinity of choices
When I step into the field of all possibilities, I will experience all the fun, adventure, magic, and mystery of life

7. The Law of “Dharma” or Purpose in Life

i. I will lovingly nurture the god/goddess in embryo that lies deep within my soul.
I will pay attention to the spirit within me that animates both my body and my mind
I will awaken myself to this deep stillness within my heart.
I will carry the consciousness of timeless, eternal Being in the midst of time-bound experience.
ii. I will make a list of my unique talents, then I will list all the things that I love to do while expressing my unique talents
iii. I will ask myself daily, “How can I help /serve?”
The answers will allow me to help and serve my fellow human beings with love.

world of words ...

I am a visual person, I like shapes and colour and putting things together, creating - words don't come easy to me, but here are a few of my favourites.
The creative writers (them!) were some time ago given a task of their 3 words - well no-one has asked me for mine, so here they are:

1 tones!
One of the most beautiful gifts my parents have given me is my name; my full name being Tonette, (I feel that Tonette belongs to my past and I only use that name on official documents - a lot of family that mainly know me from my youth still call me Tonette and it feels quite weird)
My shortened commonly used name being Toni - that is the now 'me'.
My 'creative' signature is tones! - written and spelt like that with a small 't' & the exclamation mark.

tones! is all emcompassing - a sensual stimulant
Colour (my favourite substance) includes every hue, shade, tone of everything that exists; there is nothing that does not have a colour. Even emotion has a colour - feeling blue? red hot passion!
Sound - close your eyes and feel the tone of sound; loud, soft, soothing, exhilerating, tingling.
Atmosphere - feel the vibes of the tone of the atmosphere. Tune your instincts to know the honesty of atmosphere. Feelings don't lie - when all else fails, then use words.

2 Enthusiasm
I have liked this word for a long time and I feel it is still holds itself good. It has Greek origins and literally means 'filled with God'. Words themselves are empty vessels, but people fill these words with qualities that can either build or destroy. For example you could say "Sit down", and depending on your tone could either be a warm and welcoming suggestion or a demeaning instruction filled with irritation. Filling words with Enthusiasm is a wonderful gift, whether spoken, written or thought.

3 Absolute
When I leave this material world and enter the spiritual realm (OK when I die!) this will be my Angelic chosen name - Why? I just like it, its completeness, purity and perfection.
Love is Absolute.

perchance to dream ...

I had one of those technicolour dreams last night; not being one to remember dreams, I need to note it before it fades.

There was this 'Sangoma' - an African word for the spiritual one in the village (ignorant white man calls them a witch doctor) - she was fashioned upon an ancient African Gogo - a great grand aunt, a few times removed who lived on my dad's farm.
Gogo practiced her craft in a cubicle in a popular public toilet. One of her divining tools was this very ornate antique Victorian china chamber potty. Business was going well, but she was old and about to die soon.
My friend in this dream (who was fashioned upon an old friend Maria who was neurotic, psychotic, alcoholic, kleptomaniac, compulsive liar, but a really lovely person otherwise) was the niece of Gogo and the only living heir to inherit the special spiritual powers and be the new Sangoma once Gogo dies. She was concerned that she wouldn't live up to the expectations of the village and asked for my help to be her manager - nae bother!
Then Gogo died and Maria got the potty - but in the confusion of the funeral and all, the potty crashed and shattered into 1000's of pieces. I was charged with piecing and gluing the potty together (this is one of those dreams that go on forever with a single task). Not getting the task done, I say to Maria - Why don't you say to the villagers that on the night of your 'transformation' - the same night of the storm, as you were sitting on the potty a bolt of lightening struck you and the potty while the spirits were zapping the powers into you. Say that the potty shattered as a sure sign of the 'power'.
The village was sold on the idea and business was great. Being the manager, I was coordinating appointments (still in the public toilets mind!) and collecting the cash - this was a lucrative affair!
Then the church got involved, saying that we were getting involved with the evil occult. I was the pacifier showing that the powers were direct from the Universal Life Energy Source - and were real and good and invited them to a few sessions.

Then I woke - and here it is on blog!

only in my sleep

I wish I could 'blog' in my sleep, because that's when all the 'words' flow. When I am awake, they just seem to vanish into the ether - but I am going to give it a shot.

To begin with, maybe an account of my earliest memory. They (whoever 'they' are) say that most of your earliest memories contain an element of trauma.

I remember being about two; we were living in Westgate, in Bulawayo, which was a railway housing estate (now demolished). There was a clinic just down the road from where we stayed. After having an immunisation injection, I was quite distressed from the event, and as my mom was carrying me home, I remember vomiting, crying, coughing and spluttering and feeling very poorly. My mom, however, was totally blase about the whole affair and just held me to one side to continue my 'business' and casually continued a conversation with another mom carrying a child.

What do you have to do to get a bit of sympathy in this world ???

This is the first - what can I say !!!